I'm a busy girl. In order to keep myself from losing my mind I try to create a plan in my head that will help me accomplish everything I need to do in the week. Here was my plan for this past weekend, starting on Thursday.
Thursday: Wake up, go for a 10 mile run, go to work from 1-8, then meet up with friends for movie.
Friday: Wake up, go to work from 9-5, and go rock climbing with friends
Saturday: Wake up, go to work from 9:30-5, go home and work on school work
Sunday: Go to church, then drive to Atlanta for Passion City service, go to dinner with a friend, then drive back home.
Monday: Run 8-10 miles, Meet a friend for lunch, then go to class from 4:30-8:30
Tuesday: Go to internship from 7:30-3:30 and meet a friend for dinner
Wednesday: Got to internship from 7:30-3:30, possibly go for a swim, then pick up my 2 cousins from church, and begin packing for the trip to Orlando this weekend.
Now, this is what actually happened:
Thursday: Woke up not feeling too well, opted out of the run, worked 1-8, and went to the movies.
Friday: Went to work from 9-5 (lost my voice while I was at work) then went rock climbing
Saturday: Woke up, still did not have my voice and was continuing to feel congested, went to work where I couldn't do the lesson I was assigned for due to not having my voice, ran around like a mad person because we were so busy, almost fell down the stairs while at work, hit my head on a railing, and continued to feel a little crappy due to the congestion. I then had a friend who I haven't heard form in a while ask me to dinner. I really wanted to see her so I opted out of homework and visited with her instead.
Sunday: Skipped church in the morning so that I could complete my homework assignments. At this point my voice still has not returned and I'm feeling as if my energy is slowly fading away. I decide to push myself and convinced myself that I was fine and went to PCC in Atlanta and dinner with friends. At this point I couldn't deny the fact that I was not feeling well so I canceled lunch plans for the next day and stayed the night in Atlanta.
Monday: Woke up feeling a little better and decided I could continue with my plans for class that evening. As I'm driving home I begin to feel horrible. I'm exhausted (even though I slept a good 9 hours) and I'm beginning to think about all the things I need to do and that I DO NOT have time to get sick. I decide that I have time to take about an hour nap before I have to leave for class. I get home lay down and realize that there is no way I'm going to be able to get out of bed. And I did not get out of bed for the rest of the evening.
Tuesday: Went to the doctor, found out that I have a sinus infection, got home and spent the rest of the day in bed.
Wednesday: Spent most of the day in bed until later in the evening when I FINALLY began to feel a little better.
I type all this out, not just to tell you my day to day actions, but to make a point. I make these plans and I feel that it is my responsibility to do everything that I have set up to do. Sometimes I over book myself but STILL find a way to do everything, even if it does bring myself to exhaustion. I do this most of the time because I make plans to spend time with people. People are so important to me and I cherish each relationship I have and I love being able to spend time with each person. But I also busy myself at times to pass the time faster. As much as I enjoy some of the people and things in my life in the current moment, I find myself longing for whats in the future. As most of you know, I'm about to graduate from Lee University with my masters in School Counseling. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the fact that I'm going to spend my life helping adolescents in school. I love it so much, I can't wait to start settling into my career and growing as a counselor. I also can't wait to finally be in a place financially where I can support myself independently. And to top it all off, I'm at a place where I want to be in a relationship that will eventually lead to marriage.
Everything I've listed above are good things and I have no doubt that the Lord will bring me these things. The problem I'm running into is that I'm constantly in fast forward to get myself where I want to be instead of slowing down and enjoying the place I'm in right now. The thing is that I know that everything I have listed WILL happen, I have no doubt in that. But I need to slow down and enjoy whats right here in front of me. I need to slow down... I need to rest.
I'm not gonna lie, I really really really hated being sick to the point that I could barely get out of bed. I hated having to cancel plans and I especially hated having to miss my internship this week. But the Lord has taught me something while I've had no other choice but to rest. He's taught me that I need to slow down, make more time for rest, and try not to always say yes. He allowed me to get sick because he knew I needed the rest. He always knows my needs better than I do. This rest has also reminded me to take more time to sit back and enjoy this time in my life. For if I learn to enjoy the here and now, I'll be able to enjoy the future when it comes.
I'm thankful that my energy is slowly coming back and I'm beginning to feel better! This is good because tomorrow evening I'm going to Birmingham with my sister to catch a flight Friday morning for Orlando! I'm looking forward to this weekend with my sister, mom, and cousins. We're going to be having a girls weekend and running in the princess half marathon on Sunday! I've been a little worried because I haven't been able to run in over a week due to the weather and my illness. I'm not worried about finishing, I'm sure I'll fininsh. I've just had a person goal of running the whole 13.1 miles without stopping and I've been worried that I won't be able to do that since the longest I've run so far has been 9.3 miles. I know I'll be fine though and I have no doubt that we're going to have a blast this weekend!
Despite the inconvenience this sinus infection has given me, I'm very thankful that the Lord still shows me goodness and takes care of me!
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