LIFE.

It was a Saturday night as we sat curled up on the couch in the dimly lit room. Hashing out life is our favorite thing to do. When you no longer have enough fingers and toes to count the years of friendship, filters in conversations leave and raw truth always pours out.

It doesn’t seem to matter how long we’ve known each other, one of us always finds ourselves obsessing over a boy.

“He does this and says this, does it mean anything?”

“I think he likes me. He talks me often, but I don’t really know.”

These are things you can only be vulnerable about to your closest friend. You know you can express your thoughts and fears without receiving judgment from the other side.

As I sat in the room and listened to the same questions I have heard time and time again, it hit me.

“What if this is only a speck in your life but you’re turning it into a boulder? What if God is trying to show you something that is bigger than this relationship?”

I’m surprised by what comes out of my mouth sometimes. As I listen to friends talk about their lives, I find myself saying something that I need to hear, too. Truth comes pouring out like a waterfall and I can’t help but drink it in as well.

I see articles and post daily about relationships. Articles talking about what men want, others talking about why women are crazy. We live in a relationship-obsessed culture that tries to sell us this idea that the best thing that could ever happen in our lives is for the perfect someone to fall into it.

So in the midst of smoke from all the spinning wheels, I looked my friend in the eye and said, “ We are quick to think that a relationship will be the highlight of our life, but shouldn’t LIFE itself be the highlight?”

Shouldn't our day-to-day lives be filled with wonder, adventure, and curiosity? Shouldn't we find ways to make fear and joy dance in our stomach together? It really is the best feeling in the world.

I’ve bought a plane ticket for one. I’m flying to Portland, OR in October, solo. This is a huge leap for me, to go to a new city alone. To challenge myself to step outside my own comfort zone and to spend a long weekend only thinking about what I want to do, what I want to experience. I told someone over a year ago that one of my favorite things to happen in life is when I meet a boy who I like and they like me back. It really is a rare occurrence. But when it happens, every little detail is exciting. The way they’ll text me in the middle of the day. Getting so lost in conversation that you hardly realize the bar is closing. A little flutter comes into my chest and I just love that little flutter. As much as I love the flutter, I decided that I did not want to be dependent on another to give me that flutter. I wanted to find a way to give it to myself. So I booked a plane ticket. I haven’t left for the airport yet, I have no idea what I will do in this new city but every time I see the reserved ticket, I feel that flutter.

Relationships are beautiful. They are to be cherished and I look forward to having a romantic relationship one day. It can be one of my favorite aspects in life but I can’t help but breathe a little easier knowing that it doesn’t have to complete me, it doesn’t have to be the peak in life you’ve been waiting for.

LIFE IS THE PEAK.

LIFE IS THE HIGHLIGHT.

Go and find your flutter.