Brokenness.

She was leaning against the counter, scrolling through her phone. A second later, music came gently slipping through the speakers on the counter. It was the smooth sweet notes from Coldplays new album. 

"Oh, I love this new album!" I said.

"Me too! If it took losing Gwyneth to create something like this, then I guess it was a sacrifice worth making."

By all means do I not want to belittle the heartbreak that happens when a relationship ends. I've had to grieve the ending of a relationship that was deeply rooted in me and there are no distinct words to describe how it feels some days when the hole aches and moans as it works to heal itself. 

Whether you are someone who is known by 2 people or 2 million people, the ache and pain that comes from heartbreak hurts. It really really hurts.

The comment that my friend made really hit me. She was right, if it weren't through true heartbreak, this album would have never been created. This album that has made my mind wander off, that gave me chills, that spoke unspoken words over my soul, it would have never been created if it wasn't for someone going through a time of grieving, a time of loss, a time in their lives that I'm sure they will never want to revisit ever again.

Many artist do this, they take something very strong in their lives, whether good or bad, and they make something out of it. They create something that they then share with the world. They take their brokenness and put words, color, music to it, so that you and I can go and sit with it, listen to it, stare at it, and feel less alone with whatever we are fighting with, whatever it is that we may be struggling with. 

WE FEEL LESS ALONE. 

As I go through this time of rebuilding and repair in my life, I'm beginning to look forward to the good that will be created from it. I can already feel the way my heart is being tugged, shaped, and moved to become something bigger, something better. 

I'm beginning to find myself, for the first time in my life, to be challenged to live in truth, no matter how ugly or unacceptable the truth might be or how it might look.

I would rather live in truth, than to live a life that is run by ensuring that everyone thinks I am living the way THEY think I should be living. 

The only person who has any say so in my life is Jesus and he wants me to be real, he wants me to be honest. Even if that means what I have to say isn't pretty or it isn't what I 'should' say. He wants me to live in HIM and live in HIS truth. And you know what? I think He's ok with me coming to him and saying "I'm struggling" "I can't seem to do this" "I can't get out of bed right now". You know what I have found Him to do in these moments? He cradles me into his arms, he hugs me, and says, "I love you. I'm here. You don't have to do this alone."

NEVER has he condemned me. NEVER has he gotten onto me for saying a "bad word" to him. He listens. He takes me as I am. Exactly as I am.

He takes my brokenness and turns it into beauty. He turns it into something new, something better. 

"By his wounds you are healed" (1 Peter 2:24)

This blew my mind the other day when I really thought about it. How God reversed logic, took everything we could have figured out and completely revamped it by making it so that a wound, a hurt, brokenness, could be our source of healing. 

Healing radiates from His wounds, his scars. 

I still can't get enough of that image. I can't wrap my mind around that kind of love. 

THAT IS SO MUCH LOVE!

Brokenness........ Creating beauty for all of us to enjoy.