You're the hardest person on yourself

I read this quote not too long ago that said, " Take the pressure off yourself. You're here right now. Right? This is just what's happening. Acknowledge where your resistance is, draw a bath, pour yourself a glass of wine, listen to music that puts you in a trance. You're the hardest person on yourself, so give yourself a break. Alright. You're doing the best you can, even when and if you think you can do better.... Just remember."

I then proceeded to journal these words, "Perfectionism is a joy killer."

Isn't it? Perfectionism is this guy that gets invited to all the parties but always sucks the fun right out of it. He steals our medals, he takes our prizes, the ones we have worked so hard for. He throws them into our face and says, "this isn't good enough. You are not good enough."

Even though this guy is a bully and no one likes him, we still invite him into our lives. I mean, think about it. WE. INVITE. HIM.

He doesn't just show up uninvited, he always has an invitation. We invite him to tare down all we've built, to look at our work and say "it's not enough".

I was biking with my close friend a few weeks ago. She knows everything I've been dealing with and struggling with and she asked me how things were going. I then spilled all the things I'm working on and how they are still a work in progress blah, blah, blah. After I finished with my long dialogue of my life (they are always long, I'm a woman who uses many words and details). Also, this is how I identify my true friends, they listen to all the details and when I finish, they say the very simple thing to summarize and validate what I just said. She very confidently and sweetly said, "Emily, it sounds to me like you're doing it. You're living that balance you're working for."

MIND. BLOWN.

I had been so consumed about things that I still wanted to do and accomplish that I hadn't taken a moment to recognize the distance I have come. I hadn't allowed myself to celebrate the change that has taken place. "Oh my God, I'm doing it. She's right, I'm doing it."

It's kind of like walking into a yoga class, after going consistently for a month and realizing that your
muscles aren't shaking as bad anymore, that you can hold a pose longer without falling. Waking up and realizing that you are actually doing yoga. That if someone saw you they would actually think you knew what you were doing.

It's so easy to get caught up in that idea of perfect that we miss all the little prizes, the best prizes, the things in this life that really make it worth while.

So please, whatever you're struggling with, whatever you are working on. Stop. Take a moment and give yourself a pat on the back. If you're waking up every week finding a way to implement that thing you want out of life, you're doing it. Recognize it. Love it. Drink in the moment. Don't invite perfectionism in to steal it. It was never meant for him.