Balance.

Have you ever played with a scale? You know, the kind where if you put something in one side, the other side will either go up or down. I think they may be called balance scales.... not a hundred percent sure.

The name doesn't really matter, as long as you know what I'm talking about.

I've been thinking about these types of scales lately. How in order for them to be equally balance you have to take time to put items in both sides of the scale. Then, once you've achieved this goal and you have found that equal balance, you'll have to periodically go back and either add or take away to the scale to keep it balance. Due to the changing air pressure and other things in the environment, you have to keep in check with the scale to be sure it remains balanced.

I've been working on balancing my life lately. It has felt very out of balance for a while and I've grown tired of it. I'm really bad about giving all my attention to one part of my life, neglecting other parts to the point that things get out of balance for me. For example, I'll go pretty hard core at helping other people. I sacrifice my time to help them in times of need and to be there for them when they need it. Even though this is great and apart of who I am, I'm really bad about neglecting my own needs.

Whenever I have a person come talk to me that expresses a problem with addressing their own needs, I always give them this example, " Let's say you decide to go over sea's somewhere to help feed a country that struggles to have enough food. You can go and give food all day and all night to the people but if you do not take time to feed yourself, you're going to find yourself right their with the hungry, unable to help them."

I tell them this example because I have experienced this on multiple occasions. I find myself giving and giving to the point that I realize I'm empty and need to be filled.

The only problem about waiting to the point of being completely empty is that you get desperate. You look to anything and everything to fill the emptiness. The pain of the empty feeling is so deep and hurts so much, you don't care what fills it, you just want it FILLED.

Oh how I remember those times. I remember the aches.

They hurt.... Oh did they hurt.

But when you begin throwing whatever you can find into an empty hole, you're bound to face consequences.

It's kind of like filling a car that only takes diesel with gasoline. Your tank is filled, but your car isn't going to run. Not to mention that now you have created a bigger problem and it's going to take twice as long to get your car up and running.

If only you had slowed down. If only you had taken the time to pay attention to what you were putting into your tank.

But hind sight is always 20/20 right?

So back to my scale. It's actually a whole lot easier to be unbalanced. It doesn't feel right and you're never really going to feel complete, but you really don't have to think or work. If you were to focus on both sides, trying to even both sides out, you are gonna have to focus and work. You have to revisit both sides. You have to calculate how much you need to balance. Actually, you will come unbalanced when trying to balance. For half of balancing is trial and error. In order to know what you need for one side, the other side will be off balance.

It takes constant work, constant time, and the patience to know that  you will be unbalanced when trying to balance.

One of the things I love to do is yoga. I love how yoga practice is based around balancing your body. You are constantly working to get your muscles to a certain point so that you can balance in a way that you never thought was possibly. But it takes time, dedication, and patience...... So much patience.

One of my favorite parts of yoga is how the encourage you to be at peace with discomfort. Sometimes what our bodies really need IS uncomfortable. It takes sitting in that discomfort multiple times for our bodies to learn that it's what it really wants.

Much like yoga, we have to train our mind to accept the lack of instant gratification that comes with balancing yourself. It takes dedication and work.

But after time passes, the work becomes less. You don't have as many unbalanced moments. You begin to learn and will be able to predict when you are losing balance. You'll be able to adjust without thinking about it. You won't be as quick to lose patience with yourself.

There is a balance in life. Each persons balance looks different and is made up of different items. Be careful not to lose patience with others as they struggle to find their balance, FOR IT IS A STRUGGLE. Also, don't be quick to judge someone if they are completely lop sided in their life. To be balanced is a choice and it's not an easy one to make.

I'm still working on it. I'm learning to be ok with my lop sided moments, for I know I'm not going to stay there forever.

I'm not giving up the fight. I'm learning to be less of a perfectionist of myself and being ok without instant gratification.

Time..... It really is all about TIME.